further on the bicycle journey…

As i biked down the street to my apartment today, i breathed in the lightning quick change of sun and rain that is common to this city, and gave thanks for being here, now. Portland has to be the best city to start a bike trip from. I was on my way back from a Bicycle Cooperative called City Bikes, where i bought two reused-bucket-turned-pannier-bags for the cost of one fancy pannier bag. and these are completely waterproof AND environmentally friendly, AND they will make perfect seats at the end of the day while camping.

exciting. i am also attempting to sell some of my musical equipment. i don’t know how i will ever replace it, but i know that i need the money to get everything i need for this trip.

there just doesn’t seem to be enough time to cheer for animal rights, write my papers, learn to hula hoop with more skill, breakdance, firedance, record my demo cd and be totally prepared for my show on the 22nd, and so on and so forth. why do i place so many obstacles in my path to doing a good job on something by making my interests so broad?

blargh! i don’t want to give these things up, either! i won’t!

off to read about jelly roll morton and then sleep and then class and then the acupuncturist tomorrow. and then a free class on chinese medicine!

birthday amongst strangers

i spent my birthday with total strangers. it was interesting to see how much fun that actually was. i made a few new friends and became involved with an animal rights group.

i also spent the day today thinking about my expectations for success. am i placing unrealistic expectations on myself that i will not be able to fulfill? my horoscope says so…

Bad luck for tell-tales	***
Valid during many months: Under this influence you could cause yourself considerable harm by making strenuous attempts to overcompensate for your weaknesses – for example by overdoing things or taking on tasks for which you are not yet ready. Demanding far too much of yourself is likely to lead to some kind of failure or disgrace, which will only serve to reopen old wounds. Less dramatic effects are also possible which nevertheless have the same root causes. You could, for example, feel that you are often your own worst enemy when dealing with others. Trying to appear strong when you actually feel weak could lead you into unpleasant situations. You will find it easiest to cope with this influence if you can admit that, unlike baron Münchhausen, you are unable to pull yourself out of the swamp by your own hair. No heroic feat of strength can undo old wounds. If you can recognize this you will be able to avoid the more unpleasant side-effects of this influence, but also to realize where bypassing old pain might have caused you to skip important stages in your personal development. Try to accept these uncomfortable feelings without overreacting. This influence will help you to find ways of healing old wounds connected to the physical and instinctive sides of your nature, or at very least how you can better integrate them into your life.
Transit selected for today (by user): Chiron Square Chiron, , activity period from middle of March 2008 until beginning of February 2009

(that was courtesy www.astro.com)

so am i going to fail? what should i do here?)